Toby Update

So, of course you remember Toby. He has been mentioned in my most recent posts. A few days ago I found him on MySpace and sent a friend request that he never accepted (but was online afterwards). It took quite a few people to convince me, but I finally got the balls and good timing to ask him what was up.

I chatted nonchalantly about nothing, then randomly asked if he had a MySpace (because people suggested he may not have recognized me…yeah, it sounds stupid now). Anyways, he replies with “Uh, yeah. You found me.” Uh, yeah, duh. So then my stupid blond self says “Oh, I thought that was you. I sent a friend request. Did you get it?” Come on, Tashamber, what the fuck? I say to myself now. Of course he got the friend request because as he said, “I found him.”

Well, he was very nice about my dumbass-ish-ness. He kindly explained something about how his computer freezes when he logs in and it took away the request. Yeah, It sounded like bullshit to me, but what ever. Seriously though, why couldn’t he just say he denied me and send me on my way?

So, this is the kicker. The next night (last night) I come out to get some fresh air. I am not even outside five minutes when he bluntly asks me what possessed me to date a 43 year old man. What the fuck? I just kind of drop my jaw in disbelief. “Where did that come from?” I asked. He then just said he heard it recently, and wanted to know why. What the fuck? Him asking that pissed me off. Not the fact that he was asking, but at whoever told him. Yeah, work sucks when it comes to gossip.

At this point I am just shocked. Before I answered, I asked him where he heard that. He said he couldn’t tell me. So finally I thought of a way to tell him without saying too much. I tell him that it just kind of happened. I didn’t know what else to say, especially since I didn’t want my answer to get back to the wrong people.

Well, I thought about it, and I think by him finding that out, he had to have been asking about me, wanting to know more about me. That doesn’t bother me, though I am sure it should. The thing that bothers me is not knowing who is saying what about me.

So, I decide that since he asked me the most personal question, I got the balls to press a little further on the MySpace thing. I ask him exactly what was going on with his computer. He explained again. I then got even more balls and asked him if he was gonna deny or accept. He said accept, and that he only denies people if he doesn’t know them or if they piss him off. Okay, that seems good.

But then he says this: “Yeah, I was with my friend and he asked who you were. I just said it was someone from work… She likes toys.” Oh my fucking God! What?!?! My jaw dropped and he started laughing and then told me he was joking. Oh man… If only he knew. Though, we were joking about handcuffs and spankings earlier that night. That is where he got the idea to say that, to see what I would do.

This makes me think, what the hell is this guy thinking? Is he flirting with me? Or, is he just being a smartass? I keep on getting so many mixed signals. The double meanings are really staring to get to me too. I enjoy them, but seriously, things can only get so far. He has said so many things, as well have I, which we could get in trouble for sexual harassment if the wrong people got involved.

Help me out readers. What do you see in this? Specifically the part about him asking about my past relationship and the toy comment. Is he flirting, or just being a jerk? It is so hard for me to tell these things…

Give me some love.