I have to forgive Will for breaking my heart. In all honesty, he did me a favor. I really wasn’t 100% happy with him and us towards the end. He became very secretive and closed off about things that didn’t make sense to me when he got his new job. Our sex drives were complete opposites (though when he was in the mood it was beautiful). The reason I never ended it with him myself is just because I was comfortable and felt like it was too much of a pain to break up (living together, shared checking).
I am happy to say that we are still friends. Most of the time I see that there is nothing there between us anymore. We still hang out once every couple of weeks and have Taco Bell and play video games. We hug before he leaves. That’s about it. It is getting easier and easier to hang out. The hardest part is watching him leave, especially after I get a bear hug that I miss so much.
Writing this is actually hard to write. It brings me back to the day we did break up, the huge fight we were having. It was so stupid, I am still amazed at when I think of his reasons.
As I was saying, it is getting easier to hang out, and when we do I wonder what I ever really saw in him. Though, it is funny, before we hang out I actually dread it. However, once we start eating and gaming I am glad he is there. Except when I try to vent or open up to him and he shuts me out. That makes me irritated and want him to go.
So, seven months after the break up, I am doing pretty good. I still resent him sometimes when I get into a lonely spell, but I need to get over it. I need to forgive him. Hell, I need to thank him. He has given me a chance to meet someone new (hopefully) and experience things that he probably wouldn’t have been open to (like my threesome with Brad and D).