Accomplished

Yesterday afternoon I was feeling exceptionally frisky. I was thinking about how much I wanted to be able to use my rabbit vibrator, but it was always too big. I know that over the past few months I have been using glass wands inside me, each one about ¼ of an inch bigger than the one before. So I was thinking that my rabbit is only ½ of an inch bigger than my biggest glass one.

The more I thought about it, the more I wanted it. I knew no one would be home for at least another three hours, so that made me want it anymore. The people I was talking to online ran out of things to talk about with me, so they quit talking. It was the perfect opportunity, and I went for it.

I got up from my chair and pulled out my rabbit and its batteries and put them in. Just in case I took out my glass wand and bullet and put the batteries in that as well.

I quickly got out of my pants and got into bed. I lubed up the rabbit and put it in. No pain what so ever. It was awesome and very encouraging. I turned it on with very high hopes of getting off with it.

Unfortunately that wasn’t the case. Although the rabbit part of the vibrator felt amazing pressed against my clit, It just wasn’t enough. Plus the shaft of the insertable vibe felt kind of awkward as it went around, making thrusting it in and out a little uncomfortable. However, the popping beads inside felt pretty damn good inside.

After about five minutes I felt like I was getting nowhere, except getting even more horny and frustrated. Time to get the glass and bullet out. And thankfully they were laying beside me, ready for a time like this.

I took out the rabbit and turned it off, just to replace it with the bullet and the glass wand. Within three minutes I was close to cumming. I had been thinking about how it would feel like to have my finger inside while I came, as heard it felt kinda cool. So, in the mood for new stuff, I got closer to orgasm and took out the glass to replace it with my finger. After a few seconds I felt my pussy get really hot and even wetter, clamping down on my finger and contracting. It felt pretty damn awesome, but I wish my finger was longer, as I could only get it in about an inch. I am a pretty short person, only about 5’2,” and so the position I was in was a little awkward to get my short fingers in too far.

Oh well, I don’t care. It still felt awesome. I feel pretty happy, to know that I can use something thicker. I feel more full inside when its inside. Also feeling my pussy clamp and contract onto my finger like that made me even more excited, which made me cum even harder. Anyone know any positions I could try to get more finger in without feeling too awkward or being too flexible?

One Chance (One More Time)

There have been many times in my life where I had only one chance to do something, and if I could, many of those opportunities I wish I could redo, or have more time with that one chance. But with all of those, I certainly do not wish to take anything back. If anything, I would wish it had happened today, where I had more experience, and was ready for whatever the outcome would be. I hope that makes sense.

For example, if I could go back in time, wish I could redo the weekend where I had the chance to make out with this guy I liked. Yes, we did make out, but I wish it had happened when I had more experience, or when I didn’t feel so shy. I probably could have learned a lot. The only thing I really learned from him was that not all guys suck at kissing, but guys can be real dicks too. That was an interesting experience, and I think I plan on sharing that for a later entry.

As another example, I wish I had one more chance with my bi friend. If I hadn’t been so self conscious, I would have been able to explore my sexuality more. I already said in the entry Experimentation what I would have done differently. Like I said at the beginning of this post, if only I had one more chance, one last time.

However, I think the biggest thing that is eating at me right now is the fact that I wish I had more time with the guy I “experimented” with a couple of weeks ago. Don’t get me wrong, we did nothing too serious, but I still wish I had done some things differently at the time I had the chance with him.

Pretty much what happened is this: we were standing alone outside, away from everyone, and he asked me if I wanted to touch his cock. Now this wasn’t as random as it sounds. A few nights before we were cybering on instant messenger, and the night after that we actually cybered while masturbating together on webcams. He knew I wanted to do stuff in person, and this was his way of testing me to see how far I would go.

I think if I had known that it would most likely be my only chance to fool around with him in person, I would have been more open. Yeah, I did put my hand on his dick, but only after ten minutes of him coaxing me to do so, and then him finally just taking my hand and putting it on his hard cock. My hand rested on it for about a second until I jerked it away. This went on for about another five minutes, and eventually I was placing my hand on and off his cock, reaching inside his pants, feeling his precum drip, and jerking him off between feels. Unfortunately I had to leave or miss my ride home, so he walked me to my friend’s car.

A lot of guilt had been going through me that day. I was feeling vulnerable, scared, emotional. It was just recently that I had broken up with my boyfriend of almost seven months. I kind of think he was feeding off of my emotions now, that he was using me. Oh well, like I said, guys can be dicks.

Anyways, the point is, I was scared at the time this was happening, I was confused. If my one chance had been today, or I had more time to fool around or think about it, I probably would have been less shy. Every time I am around him I get so incredibly horny. In the few days that I knew him I learned to associate him with everything sexual, by how we started talking, messing around on webcams, and that one day that I wouldn’t take back, but I would certainly redo it. Hell, if I knew that would be my only chance to mess around, I probably would have missed my ride home and taken the bus. It could have been worth it.

(Un)Coordinated

I am pretty uncoordinated especially when it comes to multitasking. When attempting to multitask, I always get distracted doing one thing, and end up not doing enough of the other. I cannot talk on the phone and messenger at the same time, I can’t do homework and talk. One or the other always ends up getting the majority of my attention. This is especially true when I masturbate using both a bullet with one hand and pushing my wand in and out of my pussy with the other.

This can get very frustrating when I come close to having an orgasm. I will eother stop rubbing my clit as much or stop pushing my wand in and out. This makes me wonder, how I would do at 69?

I have always wanted to try that, but how coordinated could I be? My ex let me try it with him once, but it only lasted for about five minutes because we could not get positioned right. Oh well, maybe another man that comes along would let me try it again.

My point is, I know my orgasm would come much stronger if I was able to stimulate both my pussy and my clit at the same time, rather than just most clit stimulation and the rest pussy, or most pussy stimulation and the rest clit stimulation.

During my first couple of years of learning how to please myself, I always got off pretty well with just clitoris stimulation. However, I always felt I wanted something more. I wanted to feel something inside of me. I remember that when I was little I had this curiosity of sticking a finger inside of my pussy, but never felt anything. Yet, when I did grow up and discovered my clit and had my first orgasms, I always felt my vaginal muscles contract. The feeling was empty, like there was something missing, and it would feel wonderful if I had a finger inside me, a dildo, or even a penis.

One night as my boyfriend (ex now) were masturbating together (I was playing with my clit, and him his cock), I asked him to put his finger inside me when I was about to come so that I could see how it felt. A few minutes later, he finished, cleaned up, washed his hands, and came back to bed.

When I felt close to coming, I told him I was ready. He leaned down and stuck his finger in. That was pretty much an instant orgasm for me as soon as he started sliding his finger in and out of my pussy. When I came, it felt amazing. I never made sounds before when I came, but this time it was different. I made lots of sound. Hearing those sounds was different, and my moans got louder. That answered the question I suppose, of whether I am a moaner or a screamer. I am definitely a moaner, with the potential of screaming.

Every so often when I would masturbate with him at his house, I would ask him for his finger. With the feeling of something inside me, I cum harder than I do with clit stimulation by itself. With someone working my pussy, and me working my clit, coordination for me is no problem. However, now that I am single again and left to please my self by myself, it is hard to do these two simple things at once.

I think what I need to get myself is a rabbit vibrator. I mean, I have one, its just that the shaft is too big for me to use at the moment, since it hurts a little when inserted. So far, the biggest thing I have been able to insert has a one inch diameter, and ¾ inch diameter for my second favorite toy. If anyone know a good rabbit vibrator that is about 1 inch or ¾ of an inch in diameter, please feel free to let me know. I would be happy to find something that satisfies both my clit and pussy at the same time.

Forbidden Fruit

As you lay there in the sun, I had images in my mind of straddling you. I just wanted to climb on top of you, lifting your arms above your head so you couldn’t move. I wanted to slowly lift your shirt up, and bend my head down and softly use my tongue to play with your nipples.

Circling my tongue around those erect nipples, then softly kissing them, only to take them gently between my tongue and my teeth, I would then softly pull. “Hey now, be nice,” you would say. For a few more minutes I would go back and forth between each nipple, sucking biting, and licking them.

Next, I imagined you wrapping your arms around me in a kiss. Deep and passionate, your tongue playing with mine, I liked the idea of me being your first kiss. Unexpectedly, you roll us over so that you are straddling me.

In one swift move, you already have my shirt and bra off. You reach down and start playing with my size D tits. Squeezing and rubbing them, sucking and biting my nipples. Suddenly you stop. When I look up, you look down at your crotch. We can both see the obvious hardness in your pants.

“I want your cock. You know I want your cock,” I wanted to say as I watched you lay there with your eyes closed. You looked so peaceful, and so tempting. But, I know I can’t have you. You know I want you though. You know what I want to do to you.

I can’t have you, my forbidden fruit. But oh, do I want it so. I want to taste you, feel you, kiss you. I want you to touch me in ways I have never been touched. Every time I’m around you I get very aroused and extremely horny. Every time I am around you I think of all the naughty things I want to do to you. Is it just the past couple of weeks we spent together that bring these feelings in me, is it something deeper, or is it just because I know you are my forbidden fruit that I could probably never have?

Killing the Buzz

To me, there is nothing worse than have my batteries go dead while doing my naughty business. I invested in rechargeable batteries a while ago, and thinking that having at least one set of batteries charged at all times, just in case of an emergency. Boy was I wrong.

I swear, the worst thing ever is putting in some batteries (ones that should have a full charge because they have not been used since they were last charged), and have them work well long enough to really get you feeling good. However, after about three minutes you think that they are dying, but it isn’t that obvious. But of course, that is when their power goes from high speed to nearly dead in about twenty seconds, probably less than that. That is what starts to kill my buzz.

Luckily, I knew I had some brand new emergency batteries that are not rechargeable. Grudgingly I got back out of bed, turned my light back on, and changed the batteries. I got back in bed, determined to get off. As I lay there, pumping my wand in and out of my pussy with my left hand and rubbing my clit with the bullet using my right, I realized I needed some visuals. Damn.

So, very reluctantly, I got out of bed once more to get my laptop so I could watch some internet porn. Third time is the charm. I had the batteries, I had the porn, I was good to go.

After about only 2 minutes of watching the male actor strip, while his partner rubbed his penis, I was ready to cum. And cum I did. It would have felt better the first time around if there were no interruptions, but it was worth it. My determination to orgasm got me so horny, wet, and worked up that the end result was awesome.

Speechless

The other night, I was wet. Wet and horny. I had to masturbate, knowing that there was no other way to get some, especially with all the crap that has went down in the past half week. In the end, someone sent me naughty pictures. I love naughty pictures. I loved seeing his hard cock when I opened up my new picture message on my phone.
I told everyone on my messenger good night, that I was off to bed. Of course I didn’t tell them I was leaving to go be naughty.

I thought that just the bullet could get me off. After about two minutes of running the bullet all over my wet pussy, I ached for something more. My favorite glass wand. It slid in so easily, and I could hear my wetness.

Slowly, I started to thrust it in and out with my left hand, as my right hand worked the bullet. That felt good, but I needed more. I turned my bullet onto full blast, and began sliding the wand in and out a little bit faster.

As I rubbed my clit and attempted to satisfy the hunger in my pussy the best I could, I thought about all the bad and naughty things I had done in the past few days. Wanting to suck his cock, feel his hardness in my mouth and pussy, looking at all those pictures he sent me of his throbbing erection.

What turned me on even more was knowing that I was able to use my imagination for once, not needing to watch an X-rated movie as I fucked myself. Normally I do need to watch a porno. It was just something I got used to. But not this time. This time it was all my imagination. I imagined what I would do with his cock, imagined it sliding in and out of my dripping wet pussy.

Eventually, and too soon I might add, I came. I came hard. I came so hard that it took everything I had not to scream out. Now, normally I am a quiet cummer, just for privacy purposes, but there are some that make me almost scream. I almost wish there was no one home, then I would have let myself scream out. I even squirted.

Afterwards, I felt relieved, relaxed. But, for at least ten minutes after I came, I was breathing heavy still with my heart pounding, my soaked pussy throbbing in pleasure of being fucked by my wand. I just kept muttering the word “WOW!” I was speechless.

Horny

I am so horny right now. I think my birth control shot is wearing off. You are probably wondering why I am on birth control if I am not having sex. Well, that is because I went on it as a precaution. When I first got together with my boyfriend, things were really hot and heavy, and my hormones always wanted to fool around. So, we decided that, just in case, I would get the shot just to be safe. I didn’t know that the shot would make me less horny (probably why it’s called birth control).

Well, since I am not having sex, the shot was starting to make me depressed, and I would always get these mood swings, I decided to go off of it. Today my next shot was supposed to take place, but I am not getting it. And it is around the last week of the shot before the next one due that it starts to wear off, making me extremely horny.

I am too horny to masturbate. I masturbated twice in a row the other night, and twice last night, about 3 hours in between sessions. I took my favorite bullet, rubbing it in circles around my clit. When I was dripping wet with need, I took my glass dildo, thrusting it in and out of my tight, wet pussy. With those two toys combined, I came. I came hard. I even let myself squirt, feeling the need for that added release.

I am also horny for cock. Nice hard cock that I can just take into my mouth, running my tongue around the head, up and down the shaft. I want to put my lips over the head, slowly putting it deeper and deeper into my mouth, sucking on the head, while still using my tongue to tease it.

I want to get the nice, hard cock nice and wet. When it is dripping with my saliva, I want to take it in my hand and jack it off. As I jack it off I want to take his sweet balls into my mouth, licking them with my tongue, and then gently suckle on them. Next, I want to move my mouth back up to his cock, and start kissing it. Up and down the shaft, all around the head. Slowly, I will start licking it, then eventually put it all into my mouth and suck, running my tongue all over.

I trade off between sucking and jacking it off. I can hear him moaning, encouraging me to go faster. While his cock is in my mouth, I bob my head up and down, making it go partially in and out of my mouth. I can tell he is close. I take his cock as far as my mouth will allow, and start softly massaging his balls. I can feel him tense up as his moans get louder and more urgent. Suddenly, I feel a warm substance fill my mouth. I softly use my tongue to tickle his head as he shoots his sticky cum into my mouth. He asks me to swallow. I do. Every last drop.

Toy Box

Last night I decided to rearrange my toys. Not to say I have too many, because you can never have too many toys. Before I moved and rearranged everything, they were just a jumbled mess in my smallest drawer, with the most used toys on top and the least used/never used toys on the back and on the bottom of the drawer.

I took some recent boxes I had from my most recent Amazon purchases and tore the flaps off. Then I switched my jeans that don’t fit from the big dresser to the empty dresser drawer I had made from taking out all my toys. Perfect fit.
I set the boxes inside the newly emptied drawer and began to sort. I connected bullets to their remotes, cleaned and jelly toys that seemed sticky (by the way, can anyone tell me why jelly toys get sticky? Is there any way to prevent it? Cleaning helped, but I have a feeling they will eventually end up sticky again).

Next came the organizing inside the drawer. Inside one box I neatly arranged my dildos, and in the other I neatly arranged my bullets. Now, most of the dildos I own I cannot use because, well, obviously I can’t unless they are skinny enough to not hurt when inserted. I didn’t realize this at the time when I bought them, but some of them still make nice vibrations on my clit. Bullets, on the other hand, are my favorites. I am absolutely hooked on them. They fit perfectly between my pussy lips and on my clit. Those went into the other box.

Next to the boxes I placed my movies I like to watch while I masturbate. Under the movies went the magazines (which just don’t get me to cum as much as the movies can, but they still can get me horny.

In the front left corner of my drawer I placed a small gum box (one of those boxes that hold 12 packs of 16 pieces of gum). Inside the box I neatly arranged my condom collection. These I haven’t ever needed to use, but I have them in case I do decide to go to the next level and have sex….They will probably expire before I am ready. But, they also come in handy when/if I ever use my dildos.

And of course, in the middle of it all, I have my Hitachi magic wand. It’s nice to have around for when I want a quick orgasm or don’t have any charged batteries, and I can just simply plug it in.

However, within the next week or so I will be receiving more toys that I ordered this weekend, so I have a feeling that my drawer will no longer be as organized.

Below are my two favorites: A glass wand and a bullet. Together they are amazing. The pink swirls on the glass dildo are raised and they are amazing inside. The bottom of the dildo has a ring and it is perfect for putting a small bullet inside or my finger to pump it in and out of me.
Next is the end result of my organizing:

Experimentation

She was just about to get off of work. I texted her and asked if she wanted to hang out, me maybe see her new place. She said sure, she would meet me in about 20 minutes. She picked me up, we went shopping for groceries for dinner, then stopped by my place so I could get my overnight clothes, since we decided that I wanted to talk more about the other night and I could stay the night.

After we got back in her car, we decided to head to the nearest sex toy shop and look around. I ended up buying a small bullet, and she got a strap on dildo.

So, after our little shopping trip, we went back to her place, she showed me around, and we had dinner. During dinner, we talked about how I felt, her experiences as being bi, and what I wanted to do about everything. I told her I would like to be able to experiment, but I was afraid. She said if I wanted that I could experiment with her, but only if I felt comfortable. I knew I wanted to, but still I was scared.

She showed me her sex toy collection. Man, I never saw so many dildos. Before then I only owned a few select bullets and the vibrator she had gotten me for prom (yes, she was the one that got me that).

After dinner, showing me her toys, and talking, we took turns taking a shower. I jokingly (yet with a hint of seriousness) asked if she wanted to take it together. She said no, but that was ok, because I was still feeling a little bit shy. However, before our showers we had talked about “shaving down there.” I had always been afraid of cutting myself accidentally, but she explained how I could be super careful and demonstrated a few techniques. She told me the benefits of having a hairless pussy, such as more comfortable, a lot cleaner, and less odors occur when shaved.

So, during my shower, with a brand new razor, I shaved. Afterward, she had me apply some scentless lotion to my pussy. That helped a lot, as I have always hated shaving my legs and under arms because of the razor burn that comes after.
After we each had a shower, it was pretty much bedtime. She asked me what I wanted to do. I said I wasn’t sure still, so explained that she first experimented with her bi curiosity by masturbating with her best friend during sleep overs as a kid. To me, that sounded like a great way to start, a nice ice breaker.

I got my batteries into my new toy I had bought that afternoon, and got in bed. I asked if she was gonna use a toy, but she said no, she could masturbate without one. Shyly, I turned it on and put the small bullet on my clit. As we lay next to each other in her king sized bed rubbing our clits, she asked me if she could play with my breasts. I said yes, and the next thing I felt was her reaching over to grab.

She got closer and bent her head down and begin to suck. She bit, squeezed, and sucked, switching back and forth between each breast. Next she asked me if I was wet. I said yes, and she asked to feel for herself. Again, nervously, I said yes. I felt her reach down and slowly move her hand down my crotch.

“Mmmmm, you are wet,” she agreed. By this time, a considerable amount of time had passed by, and my batteries felt like they were on their last bit of power (it was a cheapo with watch batteries). So, giving up on the thing, I moved my hand and reached with the other to turn it off.

As soon as my hand and vibrator were out of the way, I felt her gently press her finger onto my clit. Slowly, she started to rub in circles, getting faster and slightly harder. “Mmmm,” I moaned. “You like that? Do you like the circles, or do you like it when I rub back and forth, up and down?” she asked in a husky voice. Quietly, I replied that I liked the circles. So she kept up with the circles.

“You are even wetter now. You are really turning me on. Do you want me to put a finger in?” she asked. “Yeah, mmm,” I replied, caught up in every new sensation I was feeling. I wanted to roll over onto my side, facing her and suck on her nipples, as she did mine. I wanted to put my hand between her legs, to see what she felt like down there. There was so much I wanted to do, but something in me was holding back.

So, just as promised, I felt her out a finger in, while she continued to rub my clit hard. It felt good, but it also felt like it was getting a little sore. I wanted to cum. God, I wanted to cum. A few times I felt close, but I never got close enough.

“Tell me what you want to do,” she said suddenly, “Are you gonna cum?”

“I want to, but for some reason I can’t.”

“I wish you would too, because I am so close.”

“So what do you want to do, what would you do?” I asked, staring to feel embarrassed at my inability to cum. I really wish I wasn’t so held back.

“Normally I would go down on you at this point. Would you like that?”

“Yeah, but something in me is holding me back. Sorry to kill the mood.”

“It’s ok,” she said back. “I think you are just really confused right now. You need time to think stuff over.”

“Yeah, I am really confused. I really did like what you did to me. There were so many things I wanted to do too, but something in me was holding back,” I said, a little embarrassed.

She assured me that it was ok, and that the night was about me getting the pleasure, to see how I felt. I was glad she was so ok about everything, but still, a year later, I wish I could go back in time and overcome my fear of giving back to her.

If I ever get the chance again to experiment with a girl, I want to do the things I was too chicken to do before. I would touch her breasts, play with them, suck, lick, and even bite them. I would rub her clit and and finger her. Then, I would want to go down on her. Just to see what it felt like. I love the idea of flicking my tongue all over someone’s clit, licking it, sucking it, rolling my tongue all over her dripping wet pussy.

Bi-Curious Pt. 2

We asked them what they wanted. They said they wanted to see us on my bed, me playing with one of my vibrators while she played with my titties. We put the camera on pause while we figured out a way to fool them, but still make them believe what they wanted to.

Finally, we had it so that the camera was facing my bed, and I was “naked” from the waist up. We fixed the blankets to hide my clothed nether regions and grabbed my favorite silver bullet to tease them with. She turned on the cam, took off her shirt, and got on the bed with me.

The guys fell for it. We “turned” the vibrator on and took turns running it over each other’s nipples, then finally I put the toy under the covers and made it look like I was having a good time while she played with my nipples and tits.
The guys fell for it, but they wanted more. They wanted us to get really explicit and have us eat each other out. That’s where we drew the line. We said it was getting late, and turned off the camera, wishing the guys a good night and “maybe next time.”

That night, instead of sleeping on the couch, she slept with me in my bed. Before falling asleep though we talked about what happened. I was a little confused. I knew she was bi, but I never really thought about me as being anything but straight.

She got me thinking. There have always been signs of my curiosity of being with a girl. When I was little I always tried to watch “just the boob scenes” in movies when my parents were gone, since I knew they never showed any movies with a penis, I felt like boobs were the next best thing.

Another time at a friend’s party I had a chance to kiss a girl. I forget how it really came about, but I do remember that I really wanted to kiss her. She was willing to kiss me, but I was just too afraid.

I also remember that growing up, I always had small “crushes” on some girls, mostly girls that had the bigger boobs. There was just something about them that I was really attracted to.