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Multiple Personalities

Lately I have been feeling like I have several different personalities. I have two main personalities, as most of us bloggers do (at least I think). I have my real life personality and my sex blogger personality. Personally, I have been feeling like I like my blogging personality better.

My real life personality is shy, self conscious, and mostly a perv (making crude jokes, and saying things like “Thats what she said.” I also tone things way down and have a completely nonpervy personality when I am with my older cousins. I spend a lot of time hating my body image, especially while having a pain in the ass time trying to date. It’s a small community and most guys are either taken if they like bigger girls, creepy if they like bigger girls, or just plain shallow and can’t handle a bigger girl. It gets really depressing sometimes. That is why I love coming home and embracing my blogging personality.

My blogging personality has friends. I find myself incredibly sexy and love being slutty and flirtatious on Twitter. The people I have “met” find me sexy and love hearing about the things I do. I have no problem posting dirty pictures of myself on here or on Twitter.

I have have had a debate with myself for a while about showing my face. In the beginning I was just plain scared that someone would recognize me, plus I gave out my link to all my friends (stupidly). I stopped blogging for two years and never told (most of) them that I started blogging again. I think I am ready though. If you click through on the pictures you can see my face. The first click through is from two years ago, the second is how I look now with my hair chopped off. I admit that I feel most sexy in either personality BEFORE I chopped all my hair off.

6 thoughts on “Multiple Personalities”

  1. Funny, I feel more sexy and confident with long hair as well! The things we need sometimes…

    This is your space. Use it as you want, own it hard, and anybody who can’t handle that can bugger off. In person. maybe some of that will start bleeding through. Many of the writers I follow found confidence in their blogs and carried that out to the rest of the world. Our community here seems to lead to that.

    Stay SINful
    Mr. AP

    1. Thank you! I know I have become a lot more pervy outloud to coworkers. Heh, if anything comes up as sexual harassment, I am fucked (and definitely in a bad way), though there are others that are worse than me and those are the ones I feel most comfortable with.

  2. Such a thoughtful, well-written post on a very interesting subject. Back in December, I believe, we wrote something on our own blog about how we feel like we have secret identities and alter egos. Where we once might have considered our real selves our secret identities, and the personas we created for the blog our alter egos, it became clear to us that since we are not able to be quite as open as we would like about our sexuality in our day-to-day life, our blog personas are actually our secret identities about which most people do not know, and our “real” selves that most people see are actually the alter egos we have created to conceal them. You can read more about it here.

    Great pictures! Obviously we are stunned by your boldness in revealing your lovely face, but there’s no way we are going to downplay how turned on we are by that gorgeous ass.

    1. Again, thank you for such a positive comment. I definitely agree on the secret identity/alter ego idea. (Great post, by the way). I would love to be more open in real life than I already am. I think I was the most open while attending a local community college. I would love to really be myslef and go to one of the sex blogger conventions that I read about this spring. I would even just meeting a few bloggers here and there. 😉

      Also, very glad you loved the ass picture. I have been feeling confident in posting boob pictures, but never ass before. I might have to take more. 😀

  3. I understand exactly what its like to feel like you have two personalities, one that your willing to show people out in the world and the one online. It is freeing in a way, people judge your words and not your looks and usually that works out better. That fits me a lot as well.

    Body issues have been a problem for me for most of my life, although not issues of feeling like im too big. More just feeling ugly in general.

    What ive learned the hard way is how attractive the personality and mind of a person can be, and how that can translate to physical attractiveness. If i had realised this when i was younger i might have had more confidence now.

    And i can say the same applies to you. Your personality, online or otherwise, is very attractive:). And your pictures are great too lol. The trick is to look in the mirror and take the thoughts that come into your mind and hold them there. If there posative run with it. If there negative examine it.

    Do you feel it because its your feelings, do you feel it because you think there other peoples feelings? Could you feel happy within yourself if you knew other people didnt think that way? Are your cutting yourself down and taking away your own chances to be happy?

    This is a really long and perhaps stupid way of saying dont give up. the brain gets thoughts and over time they stick, you have to reform your thoughts. every negative needs to have a posative thought attached. Believe in yourself, and only take notice of yourself. Untill the day comes you find someone who thinks the same:). Then they will count too, noone else does.

    oh and it was very brave to show your pics with face. One day i might do the same.


    1. Honestly, I think I feel sexy and beautiful online because thats how my followers/readers perceive me. I feel insecure in the real world because the people around me make fun of me (mostly behind my back). I grew up with low self esteem in the first place and my blog and Twitter have helped immensely. I feel the need to improve my looks for others and that is not a good way to feel sexy! I am definitely trying to reverse that though.

      Feeling comfortable about showing one’s face is something that takes time. I am not even sure if I will keep mine up (in fear of being recognized by unwanted attention. If and when you do, I look forward to seeing it. I always like putting a face to words.

      Thank you for your positive feedback!

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