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I have never been on a real date, nor have I really “dated.” In a way I have, but when it all boils down in the end, I don’t feel like I have. Sure, there are people I have had relationships with, but we never started off by dating, it was more like friends hanging out at the other’s place and things progressing from there. 

I have went on “coffee dates,” but I don’t feel like those count either. Nine times out of ten they turn into duds, never seeing the person again, or being friends for a brief time and then losing touch. Then again, some say that’s what dating is. 

I have always loved the idea of traditional dating. Meet someone by random chance, at work, etc. When they ask you out, they make it clear that it is in fact a date, not just “hanging out.” I swoon at the idea of being picked up at home, then we go to our date. If things connect well, I love the idea of it continuing every weekend, something to look forward to to get through the week. They would walk me to the door and we would at least hug, if not kiss. 

After a few dates, maybe more, I would feel comfortable letting them in. We may or may not have sex. Or, maybe we wait until we become “official” before having sex. 

These days the idea of getting in a car with someone I am just meeting is terrifying. I did it once, and it was the stupidest thing I ever did. I will never do it again. I imagine I would only do this if I knew this person from work, since they have passed a thorough background check. 

I just don’t know how to meet people. I hate going out in public, and online gets really boring. I feel like I should stop trying to date people at work, since that can get awkward. 

Currently though, I am in no hurry for a relationship. I am just not there mentally. I would love a stable and consistent fuck buddy, but that is not going to happen anytime soon. Dating sounds nice though. Meeting people, making friends, and getting to know them. I just don’t know how, since I live in such a tiny area. 

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