Day 15, Post 15 – If it wasn’t for all of the memes, I don’t know if I would have anything interesting to write about. Thank you to all that run the fantastic memes. I appreciate your hard work and all that you do for the blogging community.
Content warning: alcohol, diet struggles
So, self control is something I have always been really bad with. I am certainly trying to better, and Aaron keeps me in check, but I still tend to get derailed easily.
Food is something that I have struggled with ever since I was a kid. My parents always taught me to eat what was on my plate, so of course I did. They were also the ones to fill my plate, and always large portions. That is a tiny party of why I have weight issues. We also did not have 24 hour electricity, so leftovers were rare, as they wouldn’t keep. I hate leftovers to this day.
I have gotten better about food, especially with the keto diet. I love comfort food after a rough day or week, but keto has helped with that too. Since Aaron has joined me on keto, we eat the same things. We are working on smaller portions (though that phrase still makes me cringe). It is a struggle sometimes, when I really don’t want to have those leftovers, so I will try and convince myself that I am hungry still and finish that last helping. I always feel guilty after, especially if there was more than I thought.
Alcoholism runs in my family, and I like alcohol a lot. That said, I know my limits and I tend to stick to them. I haven’t gotten completely shitfaced since that one time at Andy’s, as that was an embarrassing mess. Aaron has never seen me drunk, only lightly buzzed. Sometimes after a rough day at work I will have a lemon drop. When not on keto I enjoy hard ciders and white wines. Those get expensive though, so they are a rare treat. Alcohol is something that I haven’t really had issues with, especially with Aaron (who doesn’t drink). I mostly drank when I was lonely, with my old borderline alcoholic roommate, or waiting on Andy to text me and it was depressing me.
I have always been an impulse buyer. I hate how much I wasted on CD’s when I was a teenager after getting my babysitting money. Music I don’t even listen to, maybe only listened to once or twice. When I got my first job in college, I still was an impulse buyer, buying myself a new computer and laptop (I did use them for school, but games were my focus). I got the new iPod when they became a thing (I walked and rode the bus a lot to get around). Now that I have a mortgage, my impulse buying has mellowed down a lot. Once in a while Aaron and I will treat ourselves to something, but not before we talk about it and check the budget/bills. I am definitely a lot more conscious about what I buy these days.
Overall, I think I have learned a lot of self control in a lot of different aspects.